My philosphy...as of now

I have found that to be completely passionate about a text you must wholeheartedly believe in its literal meaning as applied to this world. You must be convinced that the scriptures are holy, fully mandated by God and fully infallible. One must also believe in the ideology attached to faith in these holy workings, and without a shadow of a doubt their minds must be unwavering in the truths it presents.

But what if one asked a question that made us vulnerable and uncomfortable and was difficult to face. What if one felt so unattached to these scriptures and this given ideology that they were beginning to find no means of reconciliation. What if they were faced with the perplexing challenge of understanding others so much so that they could no longer fully identify with what they knew before.

These are just the inner workings of an in-between mind. Facing challenging and liberating education, I see the arrogance and sometimes ignorance in those who can not see the world as it is. A place full of beauty, uniqueness, and difference...much of which, in all its beauty, is the most hated, the most destroyed and the least loved. As I observe this my heart is completely at odds, at odds with good intentions versus lack of devotion. Devotion to my faith and the passion it breeds within me. Though I now have devoted myself to understanding how people work, my only hope is to stay steadfast in my faith to understand how God works through these same people, even in its most unique form. I hope that I do not hate them out of their differences but love them and share the human capability to commune.

Many will not understand nor will they agree, but to engage in true encounter with each other we must be open to the reality that not everyone is the same, thinks the same, or believes the same.

While it is said that at times our mind is a battle field, full of distractions and now plugged with information over load, we must embrace the moment of solitude and at that moment find ourselves devout. Devout to encountering God's creation and giving thanks. Devout to the small moments in life that so easily slip away from us because of our need for constant "busyness" and perfection. We must realize that God literally dwelt with us at one time, the word became flesh and taught us, broke bread with us and most of all LOVED us.  What more can we do but love it each other, and I mean really love, so much so that we see past our differences in ideology and see in to one another's hearts!

Though I hope that I may not be the only one who faces these dilemmas, I am assured that every person who believes in something does. They have not given up their faith! They are people wanting to connect to the world around them and ahead. So do not shun us, or push us from your building walls or institutions instead...love us. Talk to us, really BE THERE with us and share in our thoughts and on our conceptions of life as we know it at this very moment in time.

Fear of the unknown has always bewitched us as human beings. But what if this 'unknown', however frightening, helped us to envelop what it means to be fully human and fully loved. God, the creator of the universe gives us so many ways in which we can embrace that. The only thing is will we do it? Though it has been odd and at times perplexing I have chosen to venture into the unknown, equating faith with encounter and there has not been anything as beautiful since.

Day 3: Snow babies and such...

As you can see two perfect snow angels enjoyed a very very good day today.

On the left is my nephew Janair holding the awesome snowball and on the right is me, truly enjoying a great time as real Buffalonians...in the snow.  I realized that today was yet another great day from start to finish. Being in the snow and cold was refreshing! Not saying that it would it be an everyday thing but it was something that I had been waiting for all winter. A time to go sledding and enjoy a good snowball fight is cherished as you grow up in the winters here and I was glad to share this beloved memory with my nephew and our Nana.

I guess over these few days I have found something or someone to be thankful for and I'm glad that this is what this project has turned in to :)

Day 2 Ms. Scruggs: A teacher who made my life

Today was a great day.  Actually not just great but pretty awesome.

It seems as though initiating this 15 day writing spree has helped to spur some pretty fantastic things. 

My day was filled with browsing over the excessive sales at the mall and movie watching with my two favorite ladies.  At the end we parted our ways, each to their own car, bound for home.  As my mom and I traveled down the escalator I get a phone call from my Nana, remembering that we just said goodbye moments ago.

"Rachel Ms. Scruggs is here! Come over and say hi!" That was my Nana, and I could tell from her elation that Ms. Scruggs was indeed excited to see me, just as I was her.

Ms. Scruggs, if you're wondering, was my Pre-k teacher and she was wonderful.  I remember the days she'd bring in pickles for our entire class to eat.  I even remember the times she read out loud to us everyday, spurring my imagination to great heights and length.

I indeed never forgot Ms. Scruggs and she never forgot me.  I can still see her face as I hastily walked over to them both standing at the bottom of the escalator. I embraced with several huge hugs and she planted a strong kiss on my cheek.  I couldn't believe she looked so good! That was my first thought.

She started in on how she had been keeping up with me throughout the news and the work with the community and youth for a nonviolence movement.  She said, "I always told my kids they'd be great! And I knew you would!"  Man I couldn't believe it, this woman had initiated my purpose, she had kick started my everything! There was a reason I had always remembered this woman and it was because as a young child and her as a teacher she exchanged positive interaction with me and encouraged me to be great.  

I pray and hope that I keep this woman in my heart forever, and even in her young 2 year retirement, so far, I hope and pray she continues to inspire young children to be great despite the odds.

My heart is joyful tonight, and if you feel as though there was a teacher who helped to inspire you share this story and your own.  Continue to remember them forever.

Thank you Ms. Scruggs I will always love and remember you...